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17 Emotional Blocks That Are Standing In The Way Of True Love

A woman demonstrating emotional blocks by covering her eyes with her hands.

Do you feel destined to live the single life? Perhaps you’ve had several difficult relationships, endured the pain of heartbreak and learned that avoiding relationships leads to an easier life. While some people genuinely prefer to live without a partner, there’s a difference between this and simply building a wall around your heart to protect yourself from future hurt.

Since you tell yourself you won’t find the right relationship, the universe responds by manifesting just that; bad dates, people who treat you poorly, and more evidence that you’ll be alone forever.

Look out for these 17 major signs that your own emotional blocks are standing in the way of true love. If you learn to remove them, you could open yourself up to a whole new world of happiness…

17 Emotional Blocks That Are Standing In The Way Of True Love

1. You can come up with reasons why absolutely anyone is incompatible with you.

Even if someone seems appealing or you don’t yet have enough information to make a fair assessment, you manage to focus on why you’re “obviously” not right for each other. You should let go of the idea of perfection as you could be putting too much pressure and expectation on yourself, your date and your relationships.

2. You let assumptions and stereotypes guide you.

First impressions matter, but do you find you are very quick to judge how you feel about potential new partners? This is a quick and easy way to dismiss people and avoid really getting to know them; your mind effectively tears others down to defend yourself against the mere idea of interpersonal hurt.

3. You compare people and experiences.

Every new person immediately gets compared to someone who hurt you previously, and you retreat based on the belief that this individual will unavoidably cause you pain as well.

4. You find yourself constantly replaying the events of your past.

If you keep looking to the past for guidance, this can easily allow these memories to keep you stuck in negative memories. While this can be unpleasant, it also comes with a sense of safety.

5. You haven’t found a way to truly let go of one of your previous relationships.

Letting go involves grieving what has been lost, and finding a way to put down the pain you’re carrying.


6. You’re still angry at significant figures from your past.

Similarly to the last point, you may be holding onto to anger and resentment. You haven’t found a way to forgive these people, and the resentment you feel actually energized you in some ways; it’s easier to focus on revenge than on healing.

7. It’s too hard for you to be vulnerable.

You don’t really let people see the real you or hear you talk honestly about yourself. Once again, this is a protective mechanism, but it can also lead to a deep, lonely ache.

8. You lack confidence!

In the event that you do find yourself interested in someone, you hesitate to share any of that attraction and are afraid to tell the person how you feel. You’re paralyzed by a fear of failure or by thoughts of past hurt.

9. You sometimes wonder if you really deserve love.

Perhaps you outright believe that you don’t deserve a happy relationship. In your heart of hearts, you believe you’ll never find anyone and that this is somehow a deserved fate.

10. You become overly controlling.

Whenever you do date someone you find yourself trying to change them into the person you want them to be, rather than loving or accepting them for the person they really are.

11. You resist intimacy.

If someone tries to push past your defensive barriers and cultivate an authentic, close connection to you, this cause intense anxiety. You find yourself resisting this type of genuine affection at all costs.

signs-emotional-blocks-standing-way-true-love12. You are holding on for your idea of perfection and nothing else is acceptable.

When you contemplate the idea of having a partner, you feel that they need to check absolutely every box on your list of traits that make up an ideal mate. Anyone who doesn’t manage to do so is dismissed.

13. You don't necessarily ‘believe' in true love.

In the moments when you think you might find love, your fantasy is that the other person will make you complete, save you from your pain or allow you to feel valued. You haven’t yet managed to fully believe that this type of love and completeness must come from within.

14. You regularly turn down social invitations.

This may be because you don’t like the idea of meeting new people; the thought makes you nervous, and you worry that social interactions will lead to embarrassment or pain.

15. Social networking sites are a source of distress for you because you have to look at evidence of other people’s happy lives.

Pictures of weddings, children, and vacations make you feel tormented.

16. You don’t want to attend events that revolve around the happiness of others, either.

Weddings are particularly uncomfortable for you, given that they focus on the theme of celebrating love.

17. On a fundamental level, you feel like you’re a victim.

Other people persecute you, and you have no control over what happens to you. This can be a source of panic and bitterness, but it can also absolve you of any responsibility for your own happiness in relationships.

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Katherine Hurst
By Katherine Hurst
Katherine Hurst, is a Law of Attraction expert, best-selling author, workshop leader, educator, and award-winning blogger on psychology, life design, structured thinking and emotional wellbeing.

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